Monday, June 28, 2010

Trepidation Nation

Don't be afraid, little flock. Your Father is pleased to give you the kingdom - Luke 12:32

There is a reason the word fear is used so often in the Bible.  Jesus knows our hearts.  Do any of these words look familiar?...fear, apprehension, dread, fearfulness, fright, agitation, anxiety, worry, nervousness, tension, misgivings, unease, uneasiness, foreboding, disquiet, dismay, consternation, alarm, panic; informal butterflies (in one's stomach), jitteriness, the jitters, the creeps, the shivers, a cold sweat, the heebie-jeebies, the willies, the shakes, jim-jams, collywobbles, cold feet.

Millions in our country take Zoloft or Paxil to deal with fear.  We have become a trepidation nation.  As I was waking up this morning, the word trepid would not leave my mind.  What is causing me to dwell on this?  Maybe, it has to do with living outside the cave in a community that is very much afraid.  I can feel these vibes coming from others.  They are also being transmitted by forces that are not of this world.

It is strange to see how fear and it's opposite, "equanimity", that is...composure, calm, level-headedness, self-possession, coolheadedness, presence of mind; serenity, tranquility, phlegm, imperturbability, equilibrium; poise, assurance, self-confidence, aplomb, sangfroid, nerve; informal cool can co-exist in a person at the same time.

In my personal life, I can clearly see why the forces of evil want to stop me and why the Heavens wish to offer assistance.  I see the wall of black clouds on the horizon.  The passengers in my boat are fatigued.  I have been asked to trade in the cross I have been carrying for a larger one.  Compared to the one Jesus carried, it is but a small twig, yet I feel it's weight and all the negative emotions that come with it.

I do not like the feeling of doubt.  These feelings will require a more intense prayer life and even greater focus on the priorities over these remaining months.  Today, I will reach out to my prayer warrior friends.  My hope is in the Holy Spirit and my prayer is that I will become qualified in time so that my mission on this planet will be fulfilled to His satisfaction.

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