Shane Mulligan Shares a Heartfelt Message

Please welcome our son, Shane Mulligan, to this blog.  I asked him to share his perspective with my readers and received this message from him on Saturday night.  Shane is attending school at the University of Montana Western on the GI bill and he tells me his writing professor likes his work.  I do too but I'm biased.  You can decide for yourself if this story touches your heart.  Thank you, son...

2020 I Won’t Forget You 

My father told me a couple of weeks ago that it was the first year anniversary from the last time I wrote a story for his blog. He asked if I would be interested in writing another piece and I responded with, “Dad I just honestly don’t have much to say about anything right now.” I just felt like last year was such a journey for me and I overcame so many obstacles that it would be hard to top the story I had then or have anything new relatable to share. I have realized the more I read and write that writing really isn’t about one-upping anyone or out-performing yourself but it’s just about writing. It’s as simple as that, just write some stuff down, share some stories and what people choose to take from it is up to them. 

So here we all are in what feels like the weirdest times that have ever occurred in all of history. I mean thank God we still have the internet because if it wasn’t for Netflix and YouTube, I think I personally would be at a new form of boredom that I’ve never experienced before and I think I speak for a lot of people when I say that. A lot of people out there believe strongly that this is either the beginning of the end or it’s at least a, “wake up call.” I’m not sure what it is, but what I do know now is that is has given me a chance to reflect on myself and my own life decisions. I don’t think I have made all the right choices and helped others every time they have needed it. I think I have spent a lot of time being selfish. I’ve made some dumb decisions and have certainly let people down. Life would be boring and pointless though if you didn’t mess up every now and then and question yourself from time to time. What would be the lesson in life if you aced it every test, I mean really? Think about it.  

In my opinion, accountability is something a lot of people are missing. When you mess up just be a man or woman about it and admit you have. I have done more reflecting in this time then just beating myself up though, I have had some real time to appreciate the little things more. I have spent a little more time and effort in sending a text back to a friend. I have called up people from my past just to see how they are doing and let them know I’m thinking of them. I played a few games of scrabble with my parents with the mindset that these times together don’t last forever. It made winning a little sweeter against an ultra-competitive pair and it also made me laugh and smile a little harder when someone I cared about told me something funny that happened during their day because I was really paying attention.  

It shouldn’t take us thinking the world is ending to care more about the people in our lives. But the simple truth is that sometimes it takes something like this to make you realize who you love and why it is that you love them. Getting sick is as much a part of life as anything, it just happens. We can blame others, we can hate others, but it doesn’t change the fact we have something on our tables that is difficult. I don’t think you find out who people are in a time of peace, a true character comes out when things aren’t pretty. So, take a second to think about who you want to be or who you want to be remembered as. I know it isn’t easy and at the end of the day it’s a “dog eat dog world” but that doesn’t give you a reason to treat your neighbor bad or cashier who is already exhausted poorly. I have seen both hate and love in the world that we live in and have found it’s been a lot easier for me to love and forgive than hate and hold a grudge.  

I was angry that the college wrestling finals got canceled. I was angry that the opening day for Baseball got postponed. I was upset about the UFC events I spent months looking forward to getting delayed. I was upset about a lot of things but thankfully my Facebook friends were all there to let me know I wasn’t the only one upset about several things. There’s nothing wrong with being angry at the world or upset. I said a few weeks ago to my mother that, “nobody ever said life was going to be easy.” And I find myself going back to that again throughout my day in my head. Life isn’t easy! It’s super hard and unforgiving. You spend your whole year working your tail off whether it’s school, work or both for a vacation that seems to last a few hours in total. Next thing you know you’re back to the grind and already trying to plan your next vacation in your head. 

Life is filled with so many ups and downs that it’ll exhaust you throughout the rollercoaster ride it takes you on. It will truly beat you down and keep you there if you decide you’re tired of getting up. I miss a lot of things right now but I am also thankful for what I do still have and what my loved ones have too. If this is just a wakeup call, I'm awake now. I spent a couple of weeks in Iowa with my family this month and could have stayed there longer since the rest of my semester is online for college. But there was a voice in my head that told me I needed to return to Montana, for whatever reason. It’s the same voice that has told me not to drive when I had been drinking. The same voice that said don’t go somewhere when something bad ended up happening. The same voice that I’ve realized is just better to trust than to question. In these bizarre times, I think you should trust your instincts and heart. I heard recently that replacing “have to” with “get to” can change a whole lot with the way you view things.  

I hope that my words could at the very least motivate anyone reading to feel a little more positive in a world filled with a bunch of negative. I was watching the news Thursday night and a lady said just think in the future when everything returns to normal just how much fun we will have and no longer take things for granted. I also saw a documentary a few years ago on life after death about a man who temporarily died in a car accident and claimed he went to hell during the time his body was dead and the person interviewing asked him something along the lines of, “what was the worst part of your experience?” and he took a minute to gather his thoughts before clearing his throat and responded with, “hope didn’t exist there.” Those four words have somewhat haunted me for a long time now. Hope and faith have been the two things that have got me through so much in life and without it, I'd be nothing. I’ll leave you with this thought though, no matter how difficult, challenging or bad these times get. We still have hope here on earth and we are here for a reason. All of us are.  

       By Shane Mulligan