Two things have changed since my high school days when I often confined myself to my bedroom listening to two songs over and over again by Styx. I'm no longer young. That's the first thing. The second thing which I consider to be the more important one is that I'm no longer angry. The source of my anger is not as important as what happened when I was able to let go of that anger. That's the day my world changed.
I heard Tommy Shaw this morning on a YouTube video featuring the Contemporary Youth Orchestra from Cleveland playing Fooling Yourself (The Angry Young Man). Click here for the link. This is the song, along with Come Sail Away, also by Styx, that inspired me to keep going during my angry times. There is a joy on these young faces that I rarely knew when I was hitting rock bottom. There were only a select few that knew my pain. I hid it well, turning to the tennis courts to smack tennis balls in an attempt to exorcise the demons inside my head. I know this joy now. I also know intensity. Intensity is the byproduct of staying in the game when you feel your chances of winning are almost nil.
Congratulations. You made it the third paragraph and you're still with me, maybe hoping I will share why I'm no longer angry. The answer is simple. I let go. Yep. That's it. I made a choice to loosen the grip on my anger and allow it to slip through my fingers. If you want details, here goes. Imagine yourself vomiting and everything that comes out of you is poison. That's what anger looks like. Left unchecked, it will kill you. Have a great day.
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